Fatherhood Resource
Fatherhood Thoughts

Not simply writing in a card.
Not something that you thought of as you were writing it the night before their birthday.

A well thought-out, intentional letter.

Right now, get out your phone. On the calendar app of your phone, create a reminder for two weeks prior to your child's birthday. Then, set the reminder to repeat yearly without an end date.

Every year, two weeks before your child's birthday, you will now get this reminder. Take that two weeks to reminisce. Look back at photos from the past year to remind you of special times you may have already forgot. Think about the moments you felt proud, joyful, scared, or loved. Jot them down. Share these thoughts with your child. Let them know how much you love them and how much they mean to you. Put those thoughts into definitive words on a page.

Be intentional. Create intentional moments that will bring you closer to your child.

It doesn't matter if your child is an infant or already out of the house, I encourage you to break out the pen and paper once a year.

Read More:
www.theintentionalfather.com/intentional-moments-1/birthday-letter

#bepresent #BeIntentional #theintentionalfather

Recommended Reading: A Lot Like Me
Author: Larry Elder
@larryeldershow

After ten years of not speaking to his father, Larry Elder recounts the day he walked through the doors of his father's diner to tell him off for good. What started as 'I'm going to give him a piece of my mind', morphed into honest discussion, understanding, and even laughter, ending eight hours later. His father didn't know the depth of destruction his words and actions had caused, but Larry didn't truly know the life and genuine nature of his father. From that day on, Larry felt true love for his father and would even tell him so every time they spoke. It's a story of forgiveness that has since inspired many others to initiate the same difficult conversation with their fathers. It's entertaining, inspiring, and a good read.

Read More:
www.theintentionalfather.com/books/a-lot-like-me

From falling off your bike as a kid, taking inventory of the pain and trying to determine if you cry or walk it off to being laid off from your job as an adult, life knocks us down quite often.

Most days, its not even that blunt. It could be something as simple as you dropped your cup and spilt coffee everywhere. How do you react and what do you do about it?

Chuck Swindoll put it this way, "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it".

If you fell off your bike you could choose to quit and never ride again; or, you get back on, fight through the pain and ride again. If you lose your job you could feel sorry for yourself and fall into a pit of self-loathing; or, you dust off your resume and get online to search for open positions. Spilt coffee? Sure you might expend a few curse words, but what is complaining going to do? Grab a towel, clean it up, and make a fresh cup.

Each scenario could be a day, week, or more of pain and frustration if you allow it. Simply spilling a cup of coffee could leave you in a state of bitterness that could effect how you interact with people throughout the rest of the day.

Rarely do we get to determine our circumstances or control every moment of our lives. Understand this and build your mental toughness to deal and handle situations as they arise. You can choose to be upset or you can choose to leave that frustration in the past and move on. The choice is continually yours.

As the Greek Stoic philosopher Epictetus said, "It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters".

Or how I remember it from my dad, "It's not what happened, it's what'd you do about it."

#bepresent #BeIntentional #theintentionalfather

Whether it was planned or a surprise, you are 30 or 18, have a doctorate degree or joined the work-force out of high school, having a child changes your life.

Bluntly stated, as a new parent, you have less personal time. Whether it's changing diapers, warming bottles, or simply rolling around on the ground with your child, your time becomes occupied in a different manner. In turn, time becomes more valuable.

For me, this shift put life's priorities into perspective. It was a catalyst that help me determine how I wanted to spend my time. Not that time was being wasted prior to children, I simply wasn’t living with the intentionality I am today.

On that note, these are the best 3 decisions I've made since becoming a father...

Continue Reading at:
www.theintentionalfather.com/post/3-best-decisions-ive-made-since-becoming-a-father

#bepresent #BeIntentional #theintentionalfather

Whether you choose to watch the movie or read the book first is up to you. Read the book together or get your own copies. Either way, the main idea here is to share the experience of both along with the deep discussion of the differences!

Perhaps you could talk about who you would have casted instead? Or which part of the book you would have highlighted more, left out, or downplayed. Or maybe, you thought the movie held its own and introduced a narrative or two the book was lacking.

Either way, get into it. Dissect it. Have strong opinions.

Enjoy these moments. Be Present. Be Intentional.

Read More:
www.theintentionalfather.com/intentional-activity/book-vs.-movie

#bepresent #BeIntentional #theintentionalfather

Be intentional in pursuing your children. Engage with them with structured conversation that will allow a peek into the heart and mind instead of simply scraping the surface. Listen to the challenges, erupt with joy on their successes.

Don't get caught up in the day to day so much that you become complacent. Seek out the bond. It won't happen on its own.

Read More:
www.theintentionalfather.com/intentional-moments-1/positive-thoughts

#bepresent #BeIntentional #theintentionalfather